Newsletter #13: Are You A "Warm Demander?"

James Comer is often quoted as saying, “No significant learning can occur without a significant relationship.” That is to say: if a student doesn’t care about you, they aren’t listening to you. 

Studies have shown that students who reported better student/teacher relationships were eight times more likely to stick with a challenging task, enjoy hard work, and accept mistakes when learning. Furthermore, in a survey of 25,000 U.S. students, the percentage of students reporting that teachers care and push them to be their best decreased from about 33% of students in 6th grade to only 16% in 12th grade (Roehlkepartian et al., 2017).

Children know when their teachers care about them. They reciprocate by performing better, trying harder, and showing a willingness to make mistakes and try again.

I find myself occasionally quoting my father when I announce to the class that, indeed, our classroom “is not a democracy, but a benevolent dictatorship!” I’m hoping they see and feel the benevolence. I value my students, their feelings, the things they say and do; at the same time, I expect them to try, to engage, to give a problem 100% of their effort, and to be respectful of the other students in the room. 

Students learn best when they are known, valued, and respected by both adults and peers. When they are led by a “warm demander” — a person who cares and maintains high expectations for engagement and performance.

Questions that Develop a Culture of Caring

So how do we balance high expectations with a culture of caring? Ron Ritchhart, a retired associate at Harvard Project Zero, has developed a series of reflective questions an educator can ask themselves as a means for gauging evidence of becoming a “warm demander.” Project Zero, a Harvard Graduate School of Education initiative, encourages educators and teachers to self-reflect and probe their teaching practices so that they can build community, belonging, and equality in their classrooms. Are you a warm demander? Check in and ask yourself the following questions:

• When, where, and how are ALL my student’s backgrounds and cultures represented in the visuals, literature, and examples in my classroom?
• How do I address bullying behaviors and gossip?
• What routines do I use to help students listen to one another?
• Where is the humor, playfulness, and joy in my classroom? 
• How would my students know that I care about, value, and respect them?
• What do I know about my students?
• What do my students know about me beyond the classroom? What might be helpful or appropriate for them to know?
• What gets celebrated, acknowledged, or raised up in my classroom?
• What does my approach to misbehavior say about my desire to build community and be empathetic, forgiving, fair, and supportive?
• Where and how do my students contribute positively to our community?

Use Self-Reflective Questions to Build a Plan of Action

Identify one or two questions that speak to you now. Identify one or two you would most like to discuss with your colleagues. Formulate a “theory of action” in which you hypothesize the likely outcomes of these actions. Then, move toward a plan to get the outcomes you desire, which may include building a culture of caring and a more collaborative environment: an environment where you know your students and they know you.

“If we focus on knowing our students… and develop positive relationships with them individually and collectively, then disruptive behavior will decrease, students will be more engaged, and they will feel more collected to the school” (Ritchhart, Cultures of Thinking in Action).